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Experiencing the Gift of Winter

This time of year Washington State is gray and wet. The sun did not come up until past 8am this morning and it will be dark shortly after 4pm.

As I ponder the waning light something holy within me stirs. Approaching the shortest day of the year doesn’t bring the winter blues it once did, instead, my awareness gravitates toward the sacred within me that revels in the feeling of absolute silence, in no-thing-ness. I go further down and it sings to my spiritual ears like a heavenly choir and what I imagine must be angelic voices…emanating peace, joy and a complete center of being-ness.

The very earth herself whispers to me of sleeping in dark, warms spaces, of the womb and the possibility that lies in the miracle of rebirth. In total awe, I experience the message of this season that speaks of rest, rejuvenation and completeness…of being whole. Of the way of being before dualism and the split of segmented sexes…the way of being in and of ourselves complete.

The feeling travels me down the course of eternity, to depths that were previously unimaginable. To the solid, sure, core which is synonymous with possibility, dreams and the spark of creation…to this place my soul takes me and the word that comes is home.

The Soul’s Longing for Home

In the above passage I took you on a little soul journey of what the holiday season means to me at levels deeper than the rituals we perform each in year to celebrate.

This is a time of year that is often full of longing for joyful celebration and the deep connections of family and home but have you ever stopped to question that longing? Why does it drive you home each year? What does it want?

Over the years I have come to understand that as humans we come into the world with an inborn desire for family. Recently I asked those questions and the answer that came back was a little surprising to me.

For me being close to my family is symbolic of my deep seeded need to truly know and experience the joy of connecting with who and what I really am.

How interesting that the first view we develop of ourselves comes from the mirrors of our family and that what we see there causes us to cycle between wanting to get away from them and wanting to go back…wanting them to anchor us and wanting them to let us go.

Our families are our starting point of awareness and our movement within them represents the ebb and flow of the life to which we go and from which we come.

This holiday season I’m expressing gratitude for my family, who has assisted me in growing my consciousness and developing awareness in more ways than they will ever know.

Merry Christmas!

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Today is the one year anniversary of this blog and to celebrate I decided to write a post of appreciation to all of my furry four-legged friends. I am especially indebted to my dog…as she (among many other beings) has provided me with a huge platform for my growth.

So with that in mind, I’d like to start with a concept that takes the basic differences between the personalities of cats and dogs and applies them to people.

The Difference Between Cats & Dogs: An Analogy of Personality Types

I saw a presentation that really made me smile of cat and dog personalities presented by Michael Grinder. It went something like this…

The difference between a cat and a dog is in accommodation. A cat personality is not very accommodating while a dog personality is very accommodating. So when I feed my dog, she comes in, looks at the food and water, and her inner dialog goes something like this, “Wow, I’ve got food…I’ve got water…this is so great! You must be a GOD!” Dog owners love having dogs because they make them feel great, hence the bumper sticker…I hope to one day become the person my dogs thinks I am.

A cat on the other hand when presented with its food and water has an entirely different perspective of the feeding routine. They come in, sit down and their inner dialog goes something like, “You know, I always have food and I always have water. But something I’ve noticed is that I can fit through that little flappy door and you can’t. Hey, I MUST be a GOD!” Hence cats are not very friendly toward following…they must be enticed to come along.

So when you take this analogy into the world of people it gives you some new insight into behavior. I’ll admit I’ve spent time being both a dog and a cat. I was most cat as a teenager…most dog when I got married and now I oscillate between the two. But what is really interesting is thinking about this theory while actually spending time with your dog…and that brings me around to rapport.

What is Rapport?

Rapport is a term that is used to describe a state of having behaviors in common, or of being “in sync” with another person but I am going to stretch this out a bit and use the term “another being”. Rapport describes the behavior dance that occurs when we are making a connection with another living thing.

In people this manifests in the wording we use, how we hold our bodies, the tonality of our voices, our facial expressions, etc. When people have great rapport you will see a kind of dance occur…they stand or sit the same, they match each others breathing and verbal ways of expression. Their gestures, facial expressions and tones of voice all go back in forth in this unconscious exchange where the lead slowly shifts back and forth between the people experiencing this connection.

Doggy Rapport

But is it possible to have rapport with your dog? After an experiment I performed quite accidentally I say yes…in fact, I now believe that ALL relationship relies on this foundation, animal or otherwise. Let me explain.

We’ve been struggling with our dogs behavior. She is a year old German Shepherd that is very strong and gets very agitated within the presence of certain people and dogs.

As busy as we are, we try to train with her as often as we can. We never understood how at times she seemed to get it, and at others she seemed to forget everything she’s learned.

How do we create the consistency? We wondered. Perhaps it’s her age and attention span…we’ve read a lot to support that. Perhaps we haven’t been consistent enough in our training methods, or she needs more time or motivation. We went round and round…until I finally understood one day when I took her for a walk.

I’m not sure how it happened on this particular walk because it really was the same as any other. I ventured out toward the trail head as I usually did. Somewhere along the trail I started to notice a groove. We had this energy field developing between us.

My dog would float to my side, slightly behind me or slightly in front. I held her leash with only about a 2.5 foot lead so we were very close. This energy field or state of oneness continued until she stopped to sniff something or saw something ahead that she wanted to chase.

Maintaining the State

Then the state would be broken and we would have to start over. So I began to really tune into her, as I would someone I am coaching. I payed close attention to her muscles, her facial expression, the way she held her body and if I saw or felt the slightest change I would very gently use the leash to pull her back into rapport with me.

It happened so naturally and was so subtle that it did not break the state for either of us and soon I could simply make a shushing sound and she would immediately correct herself. The longer we maintained this walking rapport, the less work it was to get her to respond to any command I issued to her. Her consistency was dependent on how long we maintained the state.

When I was in the state with her I could speak commands gently, use hand motions and she would immediately perform them. If I was out of rapport with her, she did not seem to remember her commands.

The Connection Revelation

I began to realize that how much we enjoy her and how easy it is for us to live with her was completely dependent on this shared state. It wasn’t that she is stubborn, hard headed, a teen-aged dog, from a German line or just plain dumb as we had often assumed…it was a simple matter of shared connection.

After spending time with my dog in this way I realize she is a vastly intelligent life form with a very special function in this world…as are all the living creatures of the earth both big and small, simple and complex. It really changed how I view relationship and the role I play in establishing connection with the world around me.

As this blog is all about connection…the lessons I learned from my dog about rapport, seemed appropriate material with which to celebrate its one year anniversary!

Plans for the Coming Year!

As a little segue for all of the spiritual adventurers out there who love stories in which animals play a significant role in a humans development, I am currently working on my book, Animal Magick: An Empathic Journey of Spirit, that is due out in 2008.

This is a true story about wild transformations, a cynical teen’s quest for the perfect pet and a crazy adventure that will make you both laugh and cry, as she unwittingly lands herself a new dad, a move to Alaska and spiritual gifts that will change her life.

All with the help of one very special, furry friend! It’s a tale about coming of age, looking for something more in life and observing the world around you for answers.

So I invite you to join me for another amazing year as I roll out the site changes, audio and books!

Thank you for reading and for sharing your travels with me as we all make this pilgrimage toward spirit, called life. You are unique and special to this world and I value you all!

Love,

PK

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One Cell

Our lives begin with a single fertilized cell called a zygote. The mother cell divides into two daughter cells and each daughter cell divides…on and on it goes until a complete human being with several trillion cells is formed. The cells each take on different tasks and functionality…they work together as a unit in order to create a fully functioning organism.

Similarly, it is believed that life on earth started with a single cell. An awesome cell that developed the capacity to reproduce; dividing and redistributing its protoplasm over the course of 3-4 billion years. Through this single cell, a complex pattern of inherited traits was created…this pattern became the blueprint for all life that has ever existed on this planet, including us. All life is created from the same material and it all has the same beginnings…like the cells of our body, it has split off and changed into various areas of functionality….the many cooperative parts of one organism.

The Earth as an Entity

The Gaia Theory looks at our earth as a planetary creature. The earth is viewed as a living being with a will and consciousness of its own. Just as the cells in our own bodies have taken on different functions, cooperating and coexisting with the cells of the other systems, so do the cells of Gaia. All of the systems are dependent upon one another and intertwined just like in our bodies. All of Gaia’s cells are important and have a purpose that contributes toward her overall health…you can not affect one without affecting all.

Gaia Meditation

Certainly this view, if we chose to adopt it, makes the value of the real resources of our world come alive to us. They speak to us of clarity, of careful use…this water is my blood, keep it clean so that it may continue to purify my body. The earth which your dwellings rest upon is my motherly lap. I will nourish and shelter you here…respect all other things I shelter that you may encounter; they too are a part of me and deserve to be here. The wind is my breath…the relationship between the oxygen producing plants and trees and the carbon dioxide producing mammals are my lungs, together the two make up my inhale and exhale. Take care of the green things of the earth, breath is spirit and together we breathe. Here my voice within you as we are of the same cell…awaken to the song of creation…let me help you remember why you are here…become aware of your purpose within my systems and live your life consciously fulfilling them.

This Gaia statue sits on my alter…reminding me daily to heed her voice.

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A Notice from the School District

On an early morning wait with Sebastian at the bus stop one of our neighbors came out with a letter in her hand. She asked if I had seen it and handed it to me. I scanned the paper that was drafted by the school district alerting our neighborhood to a possible elementary school re-zoning. Three proposals had been drawn up for changing the attendance areas in order to be able to serve the expected growing educational needs of the community. The proposals were being presented in two meetings by the committee in charge of this project in order to gain insight to public opinion, we had already missed the first one. I handed the paper back to her indicating that I had not received it…we were too new to the district and were not in their database.

The parents huddled at the bus stop talked about who could attend the meeting. I was planning to go as was another mom…but not everyone was able to attend. We decided to draft a letter to the neighborhood to make sure everyone was aware of the meeting and to offer to submit their written comments to the committee if they were not able to attend.

Before entering a position that would most likely involve helping others move through this issue, I needed to get clear on the situation myself. The idea of having to change schools is an emotional one for any parent, especially if the school is further away and doesn’t test as highly as the one your child is currently attending. At the same time I realized deeply that our neighborhood is part of a whole, and as such I needed to be able to look at the overall picture of health as well.

Hiking through the Woods

I decided to go for a walk to burn off the excess nervous energy and to get focused on what I wanted from this situation. My mind had gotten pretty active and was full of anxious chatter…I knew from experience that what I needed in order to climb out of that mental place was movement, fresh air and the elements that could help me align myself with the knowledge that the greater good is out there, available and will manifest through these events. Through the elements I can bring a larger respect for life and the wisdom of connectedness into the situation…good always comes, no matter how I may currently perceive the circumstance.

The Elements

I envisioned my intent for good as being direct, to the point and on target. Within the element of air it soared with grace…an arrow of truth. I am the archer, drawing on the power of nature I pull back the bow string, the arrow is an extension of my will and as I release it, I hear my own voice say…hit the mark.

In my mind burned the flame of purification. All surface matter is burned away before me, revealing the heart, the core, the truth…that which is real.

The cleansing and renewing waters of life wash over the remains…gently breathing into them new life. Before me now is the seed of potential.

The nurturing womb of the earth shelters this seed, nurses it to maturity and provides an opportunity for growth that is altogether new.

Getting Clear

Using these meditations the hike through the woods was a hike through my own mental landscape and heart. I emerged from this walk with a focus that encompassed the whole. I had achieved a clarity, and the confidence that all was well…and from that place, I interact with my world and others.

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A Magic Door

I looked outside…it was pouring down rain. My hope that it might let up by the time I had finished the housework waned. Oh well, I said to myself as I rushed downstairs to dress my three year old for the hike, that’s what boots are for!

We take our hikes on a network of biking trails that extend for miles on land located directly east of our house. The trail head is less than 3 blocks away from our front step. I like to think of it as a magic door to another world…because in many ways that is how it feels. Before I’ve gone half a mile down the trail, I’ve left suburbia behind. Nothing but trees, ferns, leaves, rocks, creeks and elk await me…it is a sanctuary in a place where cookie-cutter housing developments are going in by the fistfuls and Costco is not far behind.

Choices at the “Y”

Everyday the trail we take is the same until we come to the “Y”. At this point we have to make a choice…to the right lies what I fondly refer to as the trail of light and to the left…is the path of darkness. As we approach the “Y” I slow down and pause to take a look down each direction. My three year old looks at me, rain splatters her face and she sticks out her tongue to catch the water droplets. She follows my line of sight down the trail of light…this way…I ask hopefully. NO…she says forcefully and points her finger toward the trail on the left…THIS WAY.

The Beginning of the Path

I sigh…lately she has been really fascinated with this trail. Well…at least we’re outside and walking , my thoughts continue, like you should be complaining, the part of me that observes my mind piped up. I wasn’t complaining…I said to my inner watchdog…I merely sighed. The inner observer snooted, and turned her head in disdain as if to say…yeah and WE all KNOW what THAT means!

Pretending to ignore that last comment, I proceeded, knowing the observer was right and busied myself with opening up…so that I could enjoy the ride. I started a breathing meditation as we walked and began to notice just how beautiful the beginning segment of this trail really is.

Ahead of us is one of the loveliest stretches we’ve come across on this network of paths that weave in and out of this vast acreage we love to explore. The trail goes before us like a wave… weaving its serpentine tail through two hills and a valley up a steady incline. As we crest the top of the hill, cheery piles of stones (trail markers) greet us, the greens of the conifers contrast the yellow grass and the deep brown-reds of the dead foliage and awakening berry bushes. I turn to look behind me and think of just how wonderfully spaced and balanced this segment of the trail is…overlooking the valley with a view of the next hill everything has room and space to be. The evergreens are gorgeously poised…eternal, they seem impervious to change, while everything around them is responding to spring. Up ahead through the next grove of trees is the entrance.

A Change of Scene

We walk with purposeful steps through mud, our boots finding the rock underneath to firm our steps. Ahead is the entrance to the dark part of the forest. Walking in is like going back through time to a cretaceous wood. There are only the bare brown trunks of very thin and extremely tall conifers. So thick are the trees that you have to crane your neck skyward to see the green at their very tops. The light changes greatly as we enter and my three year old asks…Is the sun going down Mama? I hold her hand and answer, No Baby…the trees block its light…the sun is still up. The trail in this part of the wood is dirt and rock only…nothing grows in the limited light except some hardy dark green moss clinging to the trees. The bare forest ground is stark and I find myself noticing tire tracks, paw prints and other characteristics of the trail itself. As we round a bend something interesting happens though. A handful of trees have fallen. As we enter the light left in their wake we are surrounded by lush ferns on either side of the trail. A bright green, jolly moss has sprung to life on the trunks of the fallen trees and on the living trees that border the site as well. This small portion of the forest was full of life and had a wonderful bright feel to it. As we traveled further in we found many amazing little pockets like this…each one erupting from a place of decay causing my thoughts to turn again toward balance.

The Way Home

As we headed home I experienced a great contentment and realized that this forest I often resisted had taught me something on this day. Where there is much old growth things decline and the overall health and balance of an ecosystem, organism or any structure suffers. Nature has a solution to that in the form of change, the unhealthy parts must fall away to make room for something new…out of which comes a balance. New life always springs forth from all endings, apparent deaths and decay…this is the renewal process, the creative force of change which breathes transformation into all that fades away.

Walking home I delighted in the water droplets glistening on the bright, baby-green new growth of the pine needles, enjoying the feeling of being at one with and connected to nature. Our German Shepherd, having found a stick she deemed worthy of the trip home, was smiling happily as the rain cascaded down her nose while my three year old, who was clinging to my hand for support, walked next to me with her face skyward…in perfect joy and trust.

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An Email about Immigration

It’s funny how things will come to my attention. I received an email with a link from my father-in-law to a movie about immigration in which a gifted speaker (Roy Beck) illustrates how our current rate of immigration will affect the country. In this video he illustrates the past levels pointing toward the period before 1965 as the ‘Golden Era’ of immigration up to the current levels and what the picture will look like in 2030 if we continue on as we have been. He notes that Americans really like immigrants and view them as being hard working and family oriented, that immigrants and immigration are not the problem…that the numbers are the problem. He talks about what the population picture will be in 2030, how our resources are being taxed at the current level of population and to try to imagine what that will mean at the new projected levels. Then he moves on to ask what kind of life we want to leave for our children and grandchildren that are born and raised in this country. He also talks about how even when we take a million people per year from third world countries that this does not even begin to alleviate their problems and adds to ours such as California needing to build a new school every day of the year in order to keep up with its rising number of children. He suggests the way to help third world countries is where they live and that immigration used in that sense is a poor tool.

Playing with Reincarnation

Thinking about all this brought a thought to my mind. Leaving the world better than we found is a natural motivation when thinking of our children and grandchildren but most of our population believes that our personal problems will end when we die and that we will not live to see the end of our resources, many also think of this world as fallen…these viewpoints encourage us to take a more passive stance because there seems no sense of urgency or it seems beyond our ability to make a difference. Noticing how these beliefs shape our motivation to make changes I began to wonder how much more motivated we would be to take care of this world we live in if we thought that we ourselves would be coming back into the mess that we have created and that we just might be born in one of the third world nations that are already overpopulated…where people already don’t have enough? Could we then reach into the depths of our selflessness and see the interconnectedness that we share with our world and each other. Could we then give, trusting that we would reap the rewards of that work and effort, trusting that all life would benefit from our generosity? Could we then experience the growth as a society that comes from the inner knowledge that we are doing our part to uphold the sacred necessities of life itself…acting in accordance to what all can agree upon as needed and right?

Life is Sacred

Regardless of what ideas you hold about what happens after your physical dissolution I suggest that everyone look at their relationship with the environment and the resources of our world as something sacred that no one has a right to own or profit from and that all are deserving of. Protect these resources, love them, cherish, care for, nurture and revere them…because these are the very acts that preserve life.

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