Smelly Energy

Energy imbalance happens. For me, it started a few weeks ago after my husband issued me a growth challenge. You know, the kind that once it’s been uttered makes a part of you cringe in the corner and whimper…it had to be that one, didn’t it?

I knew the time was right to face this particular challenge however and I did my part, I got in there and I met it head on. This did not occur without creating an imbalance though. I was so focused on the challenge that I did not pay as close attention to all the signs and signals I usually monitor in the world around me that help to keep me aligned.

So I didn’t pay attention. I just kept on going. I knew that my energy was off, but I just kept focused thinking it would balance out soon.

Getting My Attention

It didn’t though. A message was trying to come through…something was out to get my attention and it appeared that it would do whatever was necessary. So, as these things will commonly manifest, my son came home from school with a cold so nasty it halted family productivity for a week. Every single one of us got it.

Sick, sniffling, barely able to talk I asked myself why I had gone along with being sick. The usual, perhaps you wanted to get out of doing certain things, answer came up but it was hollow. There was some truth to that but it didn’t stick. It took several more days and feelings unwarranted of by my life situation before I was ready to find out.

The Sticking Place

I called my friend Raj to say that something deeply unconscious was trying to make it’s way up to the surface. I wanted his help in speaking with it. He asked if I had checked to see if anything was in my energy space. I hadn’t done this, so he quickly told me what to do, I thanked him for his help and we agreed to talk again later on in the week.

When I entered into my energy something was there. It was a great big ape-like creature hunkering in the darkness. On its head was a single horn. He had such a look of disheartened sadness upon his face that I felt it burrow into my chest. Silently the eyes probed me. What they were searching for I felt more than understood. My heart went out to this creature and I asked it, “Who are you? Why are you here?”

“I am your strength.” he said, “I can not leave.” I stared at him uncomprehending and bewildered. Why on earth is my strength in this condition? Why is it outside of me? What is this energy surrounding it…like a bird with broken wings??? It seems like he should fly I thought, and the thought gave him a pair of wings that began to flap in a wild attempt to lift him from the ground and that was when I became aware of the chain. I ordered the wings to stop and my right arm became an extension of light that took on the hardness and edge of a sword. With my light saber arm, I easily cut the bonds of his restraints and the creature became surrounded by light that emanated from its horn…it was metamorphosing.

I came out of the meditation with two things; the first was the release of the energy imbalance and illness I had been experiencing for the past few weeks and second was an understanding that I had just encountered a teaching. Somehow, I had chained, shackled and locked up my strength and power. Like the cocooned butterfly, the bird that takes to wing and the flower that bursts forth to bloom one can only stay in their place of protection for so long before they outgrow it, and they simply must enter the world in their new form or they will whither to a spark or fragment of what they could have experienced.

The important thing in life is this; to be willing at any moment to sacrifice who we are, for what we could become ~ Charles Du Bois

I don’t know the limits of what I can become…but I am willing to find out